i simply jux had enuff of everythin la.
jux tell me wad to do nor.
i realli dunno le..
realli feel lik killing everyone.
seriously wad exactly u all wan me to do.
cant u all jux sit down n try to understand.
wad the fuckin use of givin all those consoling words or wad.
is jux useless.
it onli show how lazy u all r to use ur brain to think.
u al jux kip tellin me try try try.
how u all noe i didnt.
seriously u all are expecting damn lots of me.
ya everythin im in fault.
i wrong.
i nv do tis.
i nv try tt.
fine.
fuckin shit.
if u all dun bother to try to understand me.
i dun tink u all hab any right to giv me tt fake face and tell me to try.
selfish fuckin idiots.

i wan to run away from here.


this world is too cold for me to stay.

feel sad.

i nid someone to rely on.



yearn to have changes.

bought a few tops ytd...
lol~ realli cant resist the temptation of GSS....
i still wan to buy the long sleeve top~~ i like it ~~
heex.....
nid to save money ~~~

i miss ya sooo much...
stil nid to wait until fri...
feel lik killing off the tue wed thurs.
but my assignments are not yet to b done.
nid to finish b4 fri~~
LOL
saddenin~~


can my life be changed?
jux kept thinkin abt it.

i smile bcos of u =)

thx for not leaving.
thx for being ther for me whenever i nid support.
it's about four yrs le.
frm the past till now...
u nv give up on me...
n help me thru my obstacles n difficulties.
im blessed to have u.
thx for treatin me sincerely as a friend.

i miss you =)

28 weeks later.
showed how cruel reality can b.
showed how helpless human can b.
showed how fragile life can b.

i love watchin muvee..
cos it moved me away from reality.
and get myself into the story itself.
make me feel the fear, the happiness, the sadness which those characters experienced
when the muvee ended
im jux bac to reality.




love to daydream.
love to have hope.
love to feel loved.
i nid support.
i miss the past.
i hate the present.

trying to stand up by myself..
but once again and again i fall bac....
trying to make my life more useful...
end up still cant manage to change anythin....

why jux no one love me...
i even feel that friends ard me are actualli nt treatin much lik a friend alrdy...
i dun understand...
i realli dun understand...
one by one they left..
i jux wan to feel loved...
but why jux no one love me...
even my angel say those words....
i not blamin her...
but i jux realli dun understand...
how shld i do to let pple continue lovin me....
treat pple good izzit a bad thing to do?
or izzit i dun treat them well enuff...
i realli dunno..
realli dun understand anymore....

i cant change anything

i've spent AGaIN!!!
AHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~~~
now realli left with no $$....
lol...
anyway enjoyed gg out with my family....
heex.....
sry ar....
make u all wait for me to try tis and that...
oppxx...

today went to work earli in the mornin~~
i was soooo tired....
lik as if at any moment i would jux fall asleep...
lol
however after my work i become so energetic..
well i tink is becos IT'S SHOPPIN TIME!!!
lol

i still tink abt it...
i dunno why...
i noe it's no pt tinkin abt it again n again....
well i tink im someone who jux cant let go tt easily....
let time do it then...


i wan to live a better life...
independently!

screaming...
and yet no one heard.....

im lost

felt abandoned..
abandoned by love...
do i deserve al tis?
i realli dun understand...
do i realli belong to here....
i cant hold on anymore.....
i jux wan to run away frm all these...
no one understand...
it's suffocating.....
wad exactly can i do...
when all my effort jux go down to the drain...

what exactly am i...
to u all~

i jux wan to feel belonged...
tell me tt im loved....
pls~

im jux sick of cryin alone.


i wan to run far far away frm here...


it realli hurts................................................................................







save me

stupid blogger...
damn idiotic...

finally finished watchin １リットルの涙.
it's realli very nice....
very touchin....
feel so small when watchin how strong is aya

asuo love aya deeply

when u disklike me doesnt mean that i dislike u
when i dun dislike u now doesnt mean i wont dislike u in the future
im blur nt stupid
so RESPECT ME

i miss those memories....
today while walkin hm after sch
memories flashed thru my mind...
i really miss those sweet memories....
well i noe that it's already past...
wad's matters now is present...
*i smiled*

wan to thanks leeyee for being there for me...
as recently i hab been facin quite a number of unpleasant stuff...
well though she couldnt help much abt it....
it still make me feel better after scoldin those baddies together with her...
lol sound so sinful....
no matter wad....
arigato =)

*wondering*
what will i b in the future


do treasure

still feel that lost~

realli dunno what's for me in the future~

actualli got alot to blog... but lazy too~


live with no regrets..




1 litre of tears (mux watch!)

been bz to update..
well thx mark for the treat!!
n thx leong for the ride!!
lol~

ytd nyte alot of things happen...
i almost cant take it...
well im glad that i stay strong throughout...
n glad that the whole family is fine....
i love my whole family...
bless them with happiness!!!

today went out to shoppin at night with my family...
bought shoes n hair wax n lip balm n nail polish n my eyelash nutrition brush!!
lol~~
IM BROKE...
bought cap n hairband for my two sis also previously...
so im offically bankrupt.!!
too bad that i dun earn much!!
la la la~~
how much i wish that money can fall frm the sky~~
lol

i miss my angel alot...
got lots of stuff to tell uu
wan lots of hugs frm u~~
too bad u r bzzz....
hope u will take care ya?
i miss ya! =)

dun take anythin for granted....
treasure everythin everyone ard u~

=)

i cant believe ther is such a person in this world.

something wrong with the blogger sia....
dotx....

went to watch spidyman3......
DAMN NICE!!!!
i love it man....
it was tear jerkin~
well i tink im the onli one thinkin so...
lol...
cos my laopo dun agree with me!!!
the movie showed me wad is true love....
peter's love for mj
peter's love for uncle ben
aunt mei's love for uncle ben
sandman's love for his daughter
harry's love for his friends
i jux simply love tis muvee~~
thumb up!!
those who haven watch.. go catch it!

sometimes when i jux got nth better to do...
the feeling will jux come to me....
messing up my tots....
make my mood goes straight dwn...
wad is it??
i dunno either...
jux feeling empty here...
*pointing to my heart~*

tiring day~~~~
im guai today...
went to lesson 'nt very late'...
then actualli did my prac!!
god~~~
miracle do happen u noee~~
LOL....
after that i very guai guai de go for work...
heex...
guess wad...
my angel gave me a surprise...
she came to find me!! me!! meee!!!!
heeexx...
so happy...
i luv the card...
thx for the encouragement...
love ya!!!!
=)))

today for the whole day my contact lens is givin me troubles...
feelin very uncomfortable..
sobx sobx~~ eyes too dry le~~
end up havin a bad headache...

i feel that sometimes those pple who hab deep motives inside them are actualli ard me!!!....
ahhhhhh~~~~
am i tinkin too much??

tired~~~~~~

i pity my sis...
cos she is in a class with a bunch of childish and uncivilised barbaric idiots...
who onli noe how to scold pple for ownself pleasure....
well that sux...
n u noe wad....
they dun even noe that they actualli sux~~~~
well i tink i nid to remind them...
wad goes round comes round...
better take care barbarians.

didnt noe tt today's seminar also include the yr 1...
was surprised to noe actualli i took the same train with him....
yea it seemed that we dunno each other at all...
it hurts....
im weak...
i jux cant hold bac my tears...
jux cried lik tt...
can teach me how to protect my heart?
can teach me how to be cold blooded....
i was wondering if the past was a dream...
or am i in a dream now...
everything jux change drastically...
i cant believe it...
i jux wish to run away frm all tis....
love=hurtx....
i can realli feel the pain...
even now it is still vividly there....
im a failure...
a failure in love....

i tryin very hard to learn...

im breakin down...
i cant hold on any longer..........

can fate jux stop fooling me....

tix time..
it's too hurtin...
it hurt me too much...
im been tryin hard to b better....
yet i deserve tix....
wad did i do wrong..
wrong to b emo?

realli feel happy after receivin the hp accessories...
treasure it so much that i try to handle with care...
lookin at it i would smile....
cos it's sth frm him....
after the break up...
been tryin to see how shld i change myself to b better...
thinkin tt there may b one day i can b with him again....
feelin satisfied even onli sms him sometimes in a day.....
i didnt expect much...
i jux feel contented...
i jux wish to cont likin him.....
today i feel emo...
i jux wan to tok to him...
i realli dunno wher to go....
i didnt noe that tis would make him misunderstand me...
it realli hurts...
i didnt expect anything...
i cant...
i dun hab any rights to...
cos i noe im onli his friend..
im clear abt tt...
but why did him want to think abt me tix way...
knowin that cont b friend with him onli bring him sadness...
i realli wan to convince myself to let go....
he misunderstand again....
i nv wanted to let go....
that msg hurt me so much...
mayb all along i deserve all tis...
yea...
i nid to learn...
i nid to learn to let him go...
i was so afraid to see his msg...
so afraid that his msg would hurt me...
i dunno wad did i do wrong again...
i didnt expect anything frm him..........
i realli didnt....
i start to fear....
start to fear loving someone....
cos it's realli very painful...
my heart is stabbed...
bleedin...
too much~~~~~~

too hurting le...
i realli cant take it...
i nid to let go.....

i lmn u
tis will b the last time...

i need to learn.

jux cant get to slp~
dunno why...
alot of stuff jux went across my mind...
it seemed that my mind wont jux stop tinkin~~
i feel that im very silly....
wad for kip holdin on to sth that i noe is hopeless....
pathetic....

feeling blue


!!! i jux cant get to slp !!!